Twenty-one and counting

I'm slightly strung out on Vicodin today, owing to three gum grafts that were implanted this morning. It's my second of four surgeries (gotta drag it out, thanks to insurance) and no more fun the second time around.
The upside is that I have child-free day to recover (big thanks to Jon's parents!) and hence a spare moment to sit down and process our lives for the last month or so. All the bits and pieces and cleaning and odds and ends that come with preparing for The Showing of a house were finally completed and our house has had 21 visits so far. And if all goes well, we'll be under contract later today. I ought to be rejoicing about that, but it really doesn't feel very good. We're losing so much money that I'm feeling mild to moderately depressed. Granted, it will be a relief to stop the constant cleaning and attention to detail that comes with showings. (True confession: my inner clean freak was thrilled to have an excuse to clean the bathrooms, etc. every day)
Overall, ambivalence best describes our current emotions, and isn't that the most logical response to such a move? If there were nothing positive about leaving, there would be no reason to go. And if it were all positive, it would suggest there was nothing valuable left behind. As it stands, the obvious benefits are that Jon will have a job he values (and values him) and that may lead to actual job security. The obvious downsides are emotional, financial, social, familial, and just about everything else. And yet peace reigns supreme for us. We are doing the right thing. Almost every indicator points to the folly of this adventure, but we both know it is the right path. I'm pretty sure that makes this a God thing.

Communicating our internal peace and faith to the children is another matter. Isaac has been acting out lately, possibly reflecting the recent stress and and busy-ness related to The Showings. I've tried to work in some fun things while we've been out of the house (swimming, parks, zoo), hoping this extra togetherness will help. For Anna's part, her sleeping issues have worsened. She knows we're moving, inasmuch as a five year old can process that information. I've tried to couch this as an adventure, but I don't think she's buying it. If we're not moving to Disneyland, then we really shouldn't be moving at all.

One of my biggest dilemmas was how to handle Isaac's third birthday. He hasn't had a real party thus far, and I wanted to make it a special day. Thankfully, Jon's mom took on the task and we had a lovely afternoon at their house. Lunch, cake, gifts, and cousins. Isaac adores his older cousins and what could be better than an afternoon with them? Gifts, maybe. I thought the poor little guy was going to explode before we got to his gifts, so we spread them out through the day. Grandma and Grandpa watched via Skype while Isaac opened their gifts in the morning, then another gift before lunch, one before the cake, and a couple towards the end. He got a lot of Star Wars paraphernalia and car related items, which is exactly what he wanted. I am planning to throw another party with few friends once the house is under contract. My boy will have his pinata!

More immediately, we're waiting on Jon's future employer to get us the actual official offer letter. Until then, we can't know definitively which moving company we'll be able to use. Which is kind of important, no? I suppose I could begin packing the stuff in the basement, but there are spiders down there. And the days are so nice right now and the basement is so dark. Not that I can take advantage of the sunshine today, what with an ice pack on my face and sharp pain in my jaw. Apparently I can't even vacuum for 24 hours (I specifically asked about that), which is sad mostly for Isaac. He is terrified of that loud machine so I wanted to complete the chore before he returned home. Well, I shall try to make the most of this forced down time. Maybe I'll start dusting. Or maybe read The Hunger Games, if I can just convince my inner clean freak to take another Vicodin.

Update: The offer fell through and I vacuumed. I postulate a causal relationship.

Terrific Two

Isaac! You turned two years old this week! Wow! I feel that many exclamation marks are in order!!!
Here is a brief snapshot of you at two:

Favorites
   Song: "Wheels on the Bus," hands down. This must be sung before every nap and bedtime. Your favorite bus guests include babies, grandparents, Anna, Daddy, snacks, dogs, and emergency vehicles.
   Activity: Anything with wheels, particularly buses and fire trucks. You often line up your vehicles with great precision, and intently study the motion of the wheels. You seem surprised that they rotate similarly regardless of the terrain. You also enjoy chucking these cars, attempting to mimic crashes and general mayhem.
   Location: You are an outdoors guy. Come rain, sleet, hail, wind, snow, or sun you stand at the door demanding to go out.
   Food: Yogurt, blueberries, and ice cream. Also, Daddy's coke and chips, and anything on Mommy's plate. This is why Mommy eats breakfast and lunch at the counter, and why on weekends Mommy wishes Daddy would also eat lunch at the counter.
   Lovey: Almost anything soft and fuzzy will do, but top of the list are Tiger, Monkey, Blankie (the green one with brown spots), Mommy's robe, and whatever Anna is holding.
   Books: Lately, those involving potties and poop (a good sign, right?) Also, "Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus" by Mo Willems which is a brilliant read and now overdue at the library.
   Shows: Pingu! Wiggles! A youtube video from the BBC's Top Gear involving a car chase in Albania. Recently, the first five minutes of Fast and Furious Four.  

Things you can do
Now that you are two, there are many things you can do. You may not always do these things quickly, but that is okay since Mommy needs to learn patience. And watching a toddler take 10 minutes to get himself into the car seat when we are late for preschool certainly increases Mommy's patience. Among other things.
   Buckles: Any buckle that is unbuckled should consider itself buckled once you've caught sight of it.
   Balls: You've got a good arm and decent aim. It's just a shame our yard is sloped, for I fear you're getting a skewed idea of the laws of motion.
   Beatings: This is one thing I wish you didn't do. On one hand, you won't take any grief from anyone. On the other hand, you need not smack Anna for no reason. In fact, you should not smack her for any reason. Where did you learn this behavior? Anna doesn't hit you - not even to defend herself. Is this a boy thing? Sometimes you scream at children who simply look at you. I hope you grow out of this.
   Boogie Down: You love to sing and dance, and nobody does a better interpretation of the Jaws theme song than you. You play a mean shark, Little Man.
   Burlesque: Not really, but this is the closest thing to pretend that begins with a "B," and I'm on a roll with the whole "B" thing. Anyway, you've begun taking on different personas, such a "doggy" or "kitty." This shows development in the area of Theory of Mind, and as a psychologist I find it rather interesting. Also just crazy super cute.
   Bedtime: You are a reliable sleeper. Generally 13-14 hours per day, including naps.
   Burrowing: You are such a cuddler, and I adore that about you. I love when you ask for hugs and nestle into my arms. And not just when you're tired or sick, but for the mere joy of cuddling.

Isaac-English Dictionary
Many of these Isaac-isms are disappearing as your language explodes and your vocabulary and diction improve. I will be sad to see them go. 
   cah-cah = car
   my do = I will do [insert action] myself or you will reap the whirlwind
   dump-cah = dump truck, pick-up truck, general construction equipment
   IO = Isaac. This nick name was coined by Bobi from your initials. It is similar to the Armenian word for yes. I find this ironic, considering...
   no = yes, no, maybe
   uh-huh = a tentative, slightly confused yes
   gummy bum = gummy worm
   bidah! = spider and things with spider-like qualities, including but not limited to lint, cracks, and dirt
   pingu = penguin
   gin (hard g) = again
   yard = I want to go outside right now!

These are a few bits and pieces of who you are right now. I love seeing you grow every day, and look forward to seeing who you will be at this time next year.
Happy Birthday, Little Man.

Two Weeks & A Tea Party

This is the end of two intense weeks. Jon was away on work-related business Sunday - Friday and then Sunday - Thursday. This was the longest I've been alone with the kids, and although it didn't exactly go well, it wasn't exactly horrible either. Which is to say, God was gracious and kept our attitudes positive. The dark evenings didn't drag as much as expected, and I was able to function despite being exhausted. I was even able to exercise at near-normal levels.
I could give a detailed rant of what went wrong, but perhaps it's best to quickly list the highlights and let you draw your own conclusions: daylight savings time ended, toddler diarrhea (everywhere), Anna coughing up a lung, microwave broke (my Dad says the megatron busted which made me vaguely autobot-ish, and hence briefly empowered), cancellation of various social events.
On the plus side, Isaac held off on the late-night vomiting until Daddy got home. Granted, this may not be a plus for Daddy, but it worked for me.

Originally, my plan for Jon's two week absence was to do nothing. No cooking, no cleaning, no nothing. And then I looked at the calendar and realized that Anna's b-day party was happening right after Jon's final return. Tactical error, that one.
So instead of nothing, my free time was spent scouring the web for preschool party ideas and taping streamers to the wall. What I discovered was that planning a party for little kiddos is fun! Lots of fun! Our theme was "A Tea Party for Little Fairies." I tried to keep the pace fast and the activities simple. I think everyone had a good time. (Anna was overwhelmed for the first half, maintaining a blank look on her face. She spent some time on the floor, but as long as she wasn't crying I marked it a success.)

 Pixie Hollow, waiting for fairies and elves to arrive.

Here's what we did:
Guests were invited to enter the Fairy Web and retrieve their wings. Once they did so, they chose their wand & tiara (for the fairies) or sword and crown (for the boys).

 Fairy Web

The kids then decorated their wings until all the guests had arrived. We played Stepping Stones (a non-competitive form of musical chairs), Fairy Freeze (a dancing game), and Pin the Flower on the Fairy (yup, everyone gets a prize - I'm not into competitive games for this age group).

 Preparing for Pin the Flower  

(kudos to my mom for quilting the wall hanging, and inspiring our party theme).

Then it was time for the Tea Party. I brought out my second-best china, and we ate in the Fairy Bower. There were toadstools and wands made out of fruit, butterflies (yogurt-covered pretzels), and fairy bread (raisin bread with cream cheese and sprinkles). We had cheese cut into small shapes and sparkling juice.

Fairy Food




The most popular food, of course, was what I didn't make: an ice cream cake from DQ. A couple of years ago I laboured over Anna's Dora cake, and then watched kids eat only icing. Since then I decided it's better to spend more money for something the kids will actually eat, than lots of time on something they won't. I'll save my cake-decorating mojo for other things.

After the cake we opened gifts. I was on the fence about doing a gift opening, until we attended a party without one. Anna was so crushed that she wasn't able to "give" her gift. And anyway gracious giving is a good skill to practice.
If there was any gift-envy it was lessened by the treasure hunt that immediately followed. Finally, there was a free-for-all until the parents came. (This was a parents-optional event, and we had about 2/3 attendance. Next year I may go kids-only. Or not. The parents were all very helpful.)

Anna's actual b-day is next week, and I am glad we can spread things out a bit. We'll do family gifts on her big day, and maybe take her to see Disney's Tangled. It will be a mellow day, after some hectic weeks. 

Spinning, spinning into the future...

In my last post I expressed concern about Anna's upcoming dance recital. I thought it was too much hoopla and too many backstage hours for such a tender age. I still think it was too much hoopla. But I needn't have worried about Anna. She did just fine playing with her classmates, watching the big girls in their costumes, and generally hanging out.
I should have been concerned about myself. Between the pre-rehearsal and pre-show primping, the packing of snacks and "quiet activities" and costumes, the coordination of naps and babysitters, this thing easily took two days of my life and hundred of dollars. And she was on stage for less than 10 minutes over two shows. I had the vague sensation, as I was sitting in the crowded auditorium, that my daughter's dance routine was being held hostage.
But oh, how she loved it! She was a little nervous, but performed wonderfully and wanted to do the whole thing again the next day. Despite my reservations I found myself bubbling with excitement by the time her class performed. It really is something to see your baby on the big stage. So here we are, days after the event, and I debate whether to enroll her with the same studio in the fall.
On the other hand, money doesn't grow on trees. Rec center classes, here we come!

The other notable event of the past couple of weeks was my birthday. I won't tell you the day or my age, but I will give you a hint: they are consecutive square numbers.
Jon's parents looked after the kids and we went for a leisurely dinner in the mountains. Although it was in the 90's in the flat lands, it was downright cold up there. Lovely! As an added bonus, Isaac did not have any meltdowns while we were gone. In fact, he had as much fun as Anna. Little does he know this means more babysitters in his future.

Speaking of Isaac and milestones, he is now 14 months old. Only a year ago he was an infant, a stationary observer of goings on. Now he's a spinning, running, dancing participant (not all of this is welcome as he also climbs the slide). Even Anna seems to have changed a lot recently: losing her baby fat, improving in agility, figuring out "jokes," learning deception (despite obvious flaws, this is indeed a hallmark of mental development), asserting her preferences with increased confidence (often loudly), deftly maneuvering the computer mouse (thumbs down from Mom). She is becoming a little lady, and I sometimes forget to respect her burgeoning self.

The last milestone I'm thinking of is on July 1st (which is also Canada Day!) On that day it will be two years since we bought this, our first house. I really like owning a home, particularly after the tiny apartments we lived in before. We haven't changed much of it, but it is undoubtedly ours. We did not realize how useful the layout or location would be when we bought it - it was simply the best one we saw during our two days of looking. We have been blessed since moving here, and I'm glad we followed God's gentle prod when deciding where and what to buy. I don't know if we'll be here forever, but I'm happy to be here now.

Baby Days

Isaac's first birthday was this past week. The time has gone so quickly, and now the Lost Year is officially over. It's a more bittersweet event than I had anticipated. He is our last baby, and I am feeling the loss. I will miss holding such a tiny life, the new baby smell, the intense closeness that is unique to an infant. As Jon poignantly noted, children are forever moving away: they leave the womb, the breast, our steadying hands at their first step, our desires at their first "no!", our home as they run out to play, our yard when they ride a bike, our protection when they're off to school. Now I understand why many grandmothers are such prayer warriors - for years prayer is probably all that stood between them and a emotional meltdown.

Isaac's birthday itself was mellow, and I couldn't help but compare it to the day he was born. That day was warm and sunny (I have some lovely pictures featuring my sunburned arms) and we spent the morning at the zoo. Nothing out of the ordinary until about an hour after we got home. At that point my water broke, so once again I missed out laboring at home. No matter - a few hours later Isaac was born and all was well.

On this first birthday, we woke to snow and cold. However, Isaac's first taste of french toast took off the chill, and we headed to the library later on. That was a disaster. The Lost Year may be over, but the Onerous Ones have taken hold. He will not be contained or directed without making his displeasure widely known. Our little outing turned into a grab-and-dash as we took whatever books were close by and got out of there. It wasn't a total write-off, thanks to a nearby playground (sun had come out by then) and some wide open spaces. The swings are always a big hit with our kids, which is a little annoying because we have swings in our yard. What we don't have is all the other cool equipment they tend to ignore.

Anyway, after a marathon afternoon nap (birthday present for Mom?) we had some friends over for carrot cake and presents. (Cake BEFORE dinner - wow!) Isaac wore the same bemused expression the whole time, but seemed to like getting new cars and books. (Tons of baby dolls throughout the house and all he plays with are vehicles and balls. How's that for early gender differentiation?)

Anna was kind enough to blow out the candle before Isaac burned himself, and he tentatively grabbed at the edge of the frosting, unsure of what he was looking at. Things became clear once he had a slice, however.

And that was it! First birthdays are so nice, since the kid has zero expectation or understanding. The whole thing was a bigger deal for Anna, who made a few decorations, set the table, and helped decorate the cake. Gummy bears, anyone?

Looking ahead, I see some fun times. Once Isaac has lost his morning nap (surely by fall, if not sooner) we'll have a lot more freedom to do fun things. He should also be more verbal and I expect fewer meltdowns in public places. I will miss having a baby, but I look forward to knowing the boy.