Things I've Learned

Somehow my kids have found an animated Godzilla series from the 70s on Netflix, and have decided it's their new favorite show. I'm so glad there's only eleven episodes.
Anyway, it's been an up and down couple of weeks. The current buyers seem uncertain about whether they want to go through with the purchase of our house. Nonetheless, this week (the 11th hour) they appear to have gotten their acts together. Sort of. They also seem to be very novice buyers and are kind of focusing on things that really shouldn't have their attention. This has translated into extra inspections and requests that have been annoying at best. Despite this, I hope they go through with it since I don't relish a return to Showings.

Rather than dwelling on these ups and downs, and my (remarkable unsuccessful) attempts to emotionally rise above them, I thought I'd offer a quick list of what I've learned through the home selling process. In random order...

(1) When buying a home, the only things that matter are location and layout. And possibly termites.
      Rug is 15 years old? Windows lost their seal? Paint is scuffed and the wrong colour? Cement walkway is uneven? Grass is dead? Appliances are outdated? No central A/C? Furnace about to go?

It.
Does.
Not.
Matter.

     I'm serious about this. Such things can be fixed. Yes, it will cost money (both the buyer's and the seller's), but every single one can be taken care of. On the other hand, unless you're buying a mobile home, location is forever. As is the layout (although this can also be altered somewhat, for the right amount of dough). Same goes with problems that influence the integrity of the house, like termites or water damage, or expansive soil. We've all seen Extreme Makeover Home Edition - sometimes it's cheaper just to tear the place down, and who wants that hassle?

(2) Regardless of #1, the first thing I will do after buying a house is to sink money into things which do not actually matter.
     It's the little details, like fancy faucets, granite counter tops, or tile in the bathrooms that make a buyer fall in love. Once a buyer has fallen in love, very little will stop them. These things that cost a mere fraction of the total price of the house can make it or break it for a buyer. Never mind updating that furnace or spending money on landscaping to maintain the drainage. Put a groovy sink in the downstairs bathroom instead. I'm not trying to sound superior here, because I get distracted by the exact same things when renting or buying. My hope is that I have learned to follow Rule #1.

(3) Birds will always live and poop on a house that is recently listed for sale and/or newly painted.
      In the very few weeks between completion of the exterior paint and putting the house on the market, a family of birds decided to exploit a small hole in our siding. Currently, they have a lovely little nest filled with three or four babies. After consulting with an exterminator, the best plan is to let them be until the babies leave the nest. This has been annoying for aesthetic reasons and noisy reasons since their nest is right over the master bedroom.

(4) My children do not need toys.
     Like most sellers we stored many of our belongings, including a large proportion of toys. The kiddos haven't noticed their absence as much as I expected. Which leads me to wonder what else I could have included in April's garage sale.

(5) Cognitively, I am at least of average skill when selling a house. Emotionally, I am a mess.
     It would appear that, through much prayer and the advice of numerous friends and family, I have made some appropriate decisions throughout the course of selling our home. This is truly through the grace of God, since every time there's even a hint of a "challenge" (read: bad news) that requires action or a decision, I first shoot off into orbit and only Jon can talk me back down. I'm usually great at administration and seeing things objectively, but it is a real struggle when the subject matter is personal. Selling our home is one of the hardest things we've ever done. 

(6) Don't skip on the maintenance and deep cleaning.
     Many of the items we've agreed to take care of before closing are things that should have occurred on a more regular basis. And much of the deep cleaning I did before we put the house on the market should have been done with greater regularity. Had we kept up more effectively, it might have eased my stress during this process.
But probably not.

(7) Keeping the time short between going under contract and actually closing is also to the sellers advantage.
     Currently, there's a long time between the last contractual deadline and the actual closing date. During this time I anticipate an increase in my basal anxiety as I prevent Isaac from creating holes in the walls/windows.

(8) Make an offer.
     We got a decent amount of feedback from potential buyers during the showing process, most of it not very helpful. One of my biggest annoyances was hearing that "the list price was too high."
I thought this was the dumbest thing I'd ever heard. People, if you feel the list price is too high and you are interested in the property, then offer what you think it's worth. You might be surprised.
    
(9) Just don't move. If you can at all avoid it.